


Hey Jealousy

by tabbytabbytabby



Category: All American (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Apologies, F/M, Guilt, Jealous Asher, POV Asher, Sort Of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-21
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-08-05 04:25:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16360733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tabbytabbytabby/pseuds/tabbytabbytabby
Summary: Out of all the mistakes Asher has made over the past few months, shutting Olivia out is the one thing he regrets the most.





	Hey Jealousy

**Author's Note:**

> This was mostly written before episode 2 aired so their might be some slight differences  
> Title comes from Hey Jealousy by Gin Blossoms

Asher knows he can be a bit much sometimes, but that’s the way he prefers it. If people think he’s an asshole they won’t waste their time getting too close. And if no one gets close then he doesn’t have to worry about what happens when they leave. Or worse, what happens when they don’t.  
  
There’s a reason he keeps Olivia at a distance. She’s one of the only people that has seen him at his lowest point. She’d been there when he got the news about his mom and had seen him break. She’d watched as he’d fallen to his knees and begged for her not to be gone. Held him as he’d cried. By the time he’d had to face the others he’d gotten it all out of his system. That’s when the mask came out. And Olivia, who had been there for him when no one else was, got pushed to the side.

He still feels guilty about it, wondering if he had been there if things would have turned out differently. Maybe Olivia wouldn’t have gone down the path she had and wound up in rehab. He knows it’s stupid. He’s one person. It’s not as if just him being around would have been enough to stop Olivia from going overboard. He knows he could have tried, but he’d been selfish. Embarrassed mostly. And because of that he’s lost one of his best friends.

He hadn’t planned to start dating Layla when he did. He was just tired of his Dad always being on his back about finding a nice girl to date. He’d planned to maybe take her out one or two times and then that’s it, but of course it didn’t work out that way.

They’ve been friends for so long now that falling into a relationship had been easy. Layla is amazing. He likes her. She’s everything someone could hope for in a girlfriend. Pretty, smart, nice. The perfect girl. Even his Dad approves of her. It’s more of a relief than anything. One less thing for them to argue over. As long as she keeps Asher happy and doesn’t get in the way of football his Dad is fine with it. That’s good enough for him.

***

The first time Asher sees Olivia after she gets out of rehab he feels like he’s had the breath knocked out of him. He’s known she was coming home soon. Jordan has been talking about it nonstop. But hearing about it and then seeing her are two completely different things. She looks the same, for the most part. Yet there’s something different there, in the way that she holds herself.

Asher is on his feet before he realizes what he’s doing, preparing to go to her. But then she turns her head. Their eyes meet for a moment before she looks away. He watches her go, feeling each step she takes like a knife to the chest. Of course she wouldn’t want to talk to him, or any of them. Not after everything she’s been through. But it still hurts.

“Everything alright, Ash?” Layla asks him, bringing his focus back to her.

He plasters a smile on his face as he turns to her, “Of course. Why wouldn’t it be?”

“You just seemed a little tense,” she says, slipping her hand into his. She uses her grip to pull him back down next to her. “It’s Olivia, isn’t it?” Asher stares at her, trying to figure out what to say, but Layla is giving him a far too understanding smile and speaking before he has to think up something. “It’s okay. I miss her too.”

He knows she does. Olivia was her best friend. They’ve been friends since the 2nd grade and then suddenly Olivia cut them all out. Yet another thing for Asher to feel guilty about. From the look on Layla’s face he knows she feels guilty too, though for a whole different reason.

“I should have seen it,” she says, her voice quiet. “She’s my best friend. I should have known.”

“We all should have,” Jordan says. He’s staring across the courtyard at where Olivia is sitting. “Or maybe we shouldn’t have ignored all the signs when they were right there.”

Asher tunes them out, not wanting to hear them rehash all the things they could have done differently. It’s a conversation they’ve had far too often. And while Asher himself is guilty of doing the same he just can’t do it right now. Not with Olivia sitting over there by herself, fresh out of rehab. He’s had enough of wondering what could have been done differently. It’s time to think about what they can do _now_.

Of course any plans Asher starts making come to a screeching halt the moment Spencer James enters the fold. Asher knows he’s being a dick to the guy but something about him makes him feel threatened, whether it’s him going after his spot on the team or trying to steal Layla away.

 _Or maybe it’s that he’s so close to Olivia when she hasn’t given you the time of day in months_ , he thinks.

He angrily pushes the thought away. This has nothing to do with Olivia. Besides, if anyone is to blame for the deterioration of their friendship, it’s him. No, this is about the team and Layla, and what they mean to him. They’re his life now. The things that keep him focused and his father happy. He can’t lose them too.

So he might go a little overboard in his efforts to keep his spot on the team and Layla. But he can’t lose them. Not with his father breathing down his neck even more now, especially after the incident with Spencer and Coach Baker the party. His father hadn’t been happy with him for trying to intervene. The moment they were alone he’d made sure Asher knew that.

It’s finding out that Jordan had had a chance to get rid of Spencer and decided not to take it that sends him into a tailspin. Of all the things he thought he would lose to Spencer, his best friend hadn’t been one of them. He can’t help the flare of anger in his gut at seeing the way Spencer and Jordan laugh and shove each other during practice, talking about how they’re going to kick ass at the game on Friday.

“Are you kidding me?” Asher asks, throwing his mask down and stomping towards Jordan and Spencer. “What? You two are best friends now?”

“We’re teammates,” Jordan tells him. “And friends, yeah. I mean, come on Asher. We need to get along if we’re going to be able to play.”

Asher narrows his eyes, “So what? You agree with your Dad that we don’t have a chance without him? Is that it?”

Jordan sighs, “Come on man.”

Asher shoves him. He doesn’t know what makes him do it. He’s never fought with Jordan before, but he’s just so angry. And tired. And scared. He can’t lose his spot to Spencer. His Dad would be pissed and he knows he’d feel the brunt of that.

What he doesn’t expect is for Jordan to shove him back hard enough to send him flying back onto the ground. He looks up at him in shock to see Jordan glaring down at him, “You need to get your shit together.”

And of course that is when Coach Baker comes running in, ready to break up the fight. Except there isn’t even anything to break up. Things already broken. Asher knows it’s not going to be easy to fix. He’s been screwing up a lot over the past few weeks. Having Jordan look at him with such disappointment must have snapped something within him.

When Spencer holds a hand out to him to help him up, he’s not sure who’s more surprised when he takes it.

He finds himself at the Baker’s house later that night. Jordan’s not home. Asher knows he’s out with his Dad right now. But Olivia is. He can see her light on from the driveway. She’s the one he’s here to see anyway. He knows there’s a chance she’ll just shove the door in his face without hearing what he has to say but he has to try.

“I’m sorry,” Asher says as soon as the door finally opens to reveal Olivia.

“Are you looking for Jordan?” Olivia asks, leaning against the doorframe. “Or were you prepared to apologize to anyone that opened the door?”

“I was looking for you,” Asher tells her. “Though I know I owe a lot of people apologies for how I’ve been acting.”

“And I’m just the start of your long ass apology tour? Great. You’ve apologized. You can go now.”

She goes to shut the door but Asher rushes forward, grabbing it before she can close it. “Wait that’s not… I’m here because out of everyone, I owe you the biggest apology.”

Olivia stares at him for a moment before waving her hand in a ‘go on’ gesture, “So enlighten me. Why am I owed the biggest apology?”

“Because it started with you,” Asher says. “You were there for me in one of my worst moments and then I just pushed you aside and started ignoring you. It wasn’t fair.”

“No it wasn’t,” Olivia agrees. “It sucked. I thought maybe we were finally getting somewhere and it would bring us closer and then you went and shut me out completely.”

“I was scared,” Asher tells her. “I just lost my mom. I couldn’t risk letting anyone get close to me again.”

“Yet you let Layla in,” Olivia says.

“No I didn’t. Not really. We were together but I still kept her at a distance. Which is why I can’t blame her for wanting to find someone else that could treat her better.”

“You _were_ together?” Olivia asks. “Aren’t you still?”

Asher shakes his head, “No. We broke up. I guess she finally had enough of my bullshit. The fight today was the last straw.”

“I still can’t believe you tried to fight Jordan,” Olivia says. “Of all the people on the team.”

“It wasn’t my smartest moment,” Asher agrees. “But I’m going to do whatever I have to in order to make up for it.”

“You really are sorry,” Olivia says, sounding surprised.

Asher nods, “I am.”

“You know you’re an asshole,” Olivia says, after a few moments of silence.

Asher sighs, “I know.”

“And I’m still pissed at you.”

“As you should be.”

She eyes him critically before sighing and stepping back from the door, “Well you might as well come in.”

He doesn’t smile. He knows that would only piss her off. But he still can’t help but feel relieved. It might not be much, but she’s talking to him and willing to listen. It’s a start.


End file.
